Thursday, January 24, 2013

My So-Called Television-Inspired Life

From this website

    So I know I talk about television a lot, but I can’t deny that I love television. I’m not afraid to admit that. There are people out there that say ridiculous things like “Oh we don’t watch television”, as if television is for the lesser, type Z human being.  For me, television has been so inspiring and symbolic throughout my life. It seems that I’ve always gone through phases of being inspired by a certain character and feeling like they were the epitome of the person that I was/ wanted to be. That being said, these characters have never been a Real Housewife, a Kardashian, or anyone from a show on ABC Family.   They’ve been girls that embody almost exactly what I’m going through in my life, or exemplify the woman I want to become. Or they just lived a fantasy that I can’t help but become green with envy about. Mostly because I watched these fictional and elaborate lifestyles as I was lying in bed, wearing plaid pajama pants, an old Nancy Sinatra sweatshirt, and eating a bowl of pretzels. So in that case they were simply an interesting juxtaposition to what my life is.

    Regardless, each has very different ways for being inspiring to me. Therefore, this is why I assume an eclectic state of mind.  

Lizzie McGuire – Holy moly, do you guys remember that show?? It seems like it was on a decade ago.  OH WAIT it was! But that all made more since when I just Googled (which, in fact, is NOT a verb according to Microsoft word) The Lizzie McGuire Show and saw A) what they were wearing and B) how much of a tween Hilary Duff looks like.  It is so strange how things change. But I remember how much I looked up to Lizzie McGuire. Most definitely not because of her perfections, but because she was always getting into some sort of trouble because of her clumsiness, awkward way around boys, and overall lack of “coolness”. Granted I did always wonder why, with her adorable looks, she never attracted guys, BUT a bitchy amazon like Kate did. However, I digress. As an awkward 11 or 12-year-old, I looked up to Lizzie, as she was a symbol for that class of girls who just wanted to wear colorful, fake hair pieces, uniquely, clash-y jewelry, and also wanted a boyfriend so bad they couldn’t stand it. It was the beginning of me realizing it was often hard to try to have it all.

Blair & Serena – If you don’t know who these people are, and you are a/ have been a teenage girl in the past five years, then I commend you. Honestly I never really admired any of the characters of Gossip Girl, not even lonely boy/ the Gossip Girl (although, sometimes Blair could be the perfect heroine to bring out my inner bitch). I more just admired the fantasy of a lifestyle they lived. Wearing the incredible clothing that they had, sitting on the steps of the Metropolitan Museum of Art every morning, going to Europe on their own whenever they were just “fed up” with everything around them, and of course living in the beautiful Upper East Side of New York City. As I said before, sometimes I would just sit by my lonesome in the middle of the night watching and longing  for this unrealistic montage of scandal, luxe living, and the most marvelous dresses I’ve ever seen. 

Phoebe Buffay – Although I’ve never been a die-hard Friends fan, I do remember watching episodes with my parents as a young girl and always feeling an instant connection to the character of Phoebe. She was always thought of as the odd, funny one of the group (with an emphasis on the “odd” description). Somehow, even as a first and second grader, I felt like the odd one of every group, and in a way, Phoebe taught me to own it. Despite how “black-sheep” I felt in many situations I experienced as a youngin’, I still wanted to act weird, play an elaborate game of “Dungeon Space Queen” instead of kick ball, sing loud and obnoxiously at all the wrong times, and even dressed like Phoebe Buffay at my “dress like your favorite television character”-themed 10th birthday party, when I could have dressed like a more age appropriate character such as… Lizzie McGuire.

And last but certainly not least…

Leslie Knope & Liz Lemon – While both are on completely different television shows, and both are now the cliché “nerdy girl” heroes, I still can’t help but put them together as my two most admired TV characters. Honestly it all started with Women’s News/Weekend Update on SNL, but separately on their respective television shows, they embody the grounded, funny, hardworking, and above all imperfect person that I admire. Liz with her no-holds-bar craziness in the men’s club of television writing, her being able to be best friends with her male polar opposite, and never giving up on having it all, has inspired my writing, sense of humor, and my ability to not take myself too seriously. Leslie Knope while in a way being similar to Liz, is in her own way a caricature for what it means to work hard and always maintain the attitude of “it can be done”, without getting so caught up in herself to not give a shit about anyone else’s needs. Also, it makes me very happy that they’ve both ended up with television husbands who love, respect, and treat them with the upmost support for their ventures.

    When I read back this blog, I feel like what I’m really trying to say is… 

    I want to personify the ideal quirky, sarcastic, witty, feminist, and above all hard-working woman who can take a joke, hang out with the men without being too bro-ish, or on the other end of a that, a slut, while simultaneously finding the man of her dreams in a equality-loving, smart guy, who doesn’t have weird teeth AND ALL AT THE SAME TIME be the girl that carries a Prada bag because they’re just so damn pretty.

   And that is all.


Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Cake Cake Cake Cake Cake Cake

Warning: This blog is NOT about cake. Sorry. 
Tradition: Child must take picture with a piece of paper showing their age. You're welcome, mother.      
   Birthdays are so interesting. Sometimes I long for the days when my dad put a Belle (from Beauty and the Beast) Barbie on my cake, played happy birthday to me on the guitar, all while I celebrated by wearing a tutu. To be fair, I did dress like a mutha f**kin’ princess today, but that’s beside the point. Last year for my 18th birthday I went to a Waffle House at 2 in the morning when I wasn’t even inebriated. Then I went to see The Muppets with my mom. So that was pretty excellent.
     It’s always fun to be nostalgic on birthdays. I like to think about all my past birthdays: fun ones (bowling in second grade, after winning a basketball game), awkwardly fun ones (sixth grade sleepover with almost 15 girls/ my dad coming to school to sing to me in the lunch room while accompanied by his guitar), and totally classy and chic ones (going to a cute Italian restaurant with my best girlfriends, flirting with a cute waiter, and then going to see Black Swan). But the best is traditions. Sadly, some traditions go away when you go to college (heart shaped pancakes by Mom/ family dinner), but thanks to social media I can keep some of them alive! Thanks for the birthday wishes, friends and neighbors!


Tuesday, January 15, 2013

I know you guys didn't watch but... My thoughts on the Golden Globes!

Photo from this website

    The other night I watched the infamous Golden Globes in what seemed like the first time in forever. First of all, I guess being a strict Oscar snob the past several years as spoiled me into thinking that every awards show venue is as triumphantly huge as the Kodak Theater, excessive number of balcony seats and all. To my surprise, the size of the ballroom, where the Globes are hosted, reminded me of a Sheraton Convention Center. And all these random movie stars would just pop out of nowhere and all I could think was, “Where the hell are you hiding these people, HFPA?”

    In an attempt to chronicle my take on the Globes, I hope not to emulate that of the Usweekly website’s editorial on the subject (and I hope to God that my writing is slightly better than theirs).  But the show was definitely interesting and there are several items that I just simply must share my thoughts on.

   First of all, let me just state a fact: Amy and Tina were a smashing success. Maybe I’m biased because they’re two of my favorite comediennes ever, but can you really not laugh at jokes about A) Taylor Swift! Muhaha B) Meryl Streep being amazing in anything she does, including having the flu, and C) noting the yearly assembly of the average sell-outs of television and the pretentious, pretty people of film.

    Other than Amy and Tina’s brilliant zingers (Usweekly used this word in their article… #SynonymProblems), I thought it was pretty funny to see that Selma Hayek and Paul Rudd didn’t actually know what they were doing at the Globes. Also, who can forget Kristen Wiig and Will Ferrell’s bit before presenting best Best Actress in a musical or comedy. (Btw, I heard Les Miserbles was one of the best musical comedies of the year!) I digress to say that my best friend Alanah and I did the same entrance on stage at a Choir Show in high school, so I’m flattered to have been honored by greats such as Wiig and Ferrell in that way. But also I must say that if producers don’t catch the hint that those two should be hosting next year, then I don’t know what else society has to live for.

    What can be more notorious about awards shows than the acceptance speeches? I kept hearing the ones from winners  like Jessica Chastain, Annie Hathaway, and Jennifer Lawrence, and while all speeches were moving and sweet, I just wanted to scream at them, “Save it for the Oscars!!” It seems like the Golden Globes always get all the good speeches because a majority of the time, the Globes are only a preface to the Oscars. Now when Anne Hathaway wins best supporting actress at the Oscars she just going to be like this.

For my last bit on the Globes, I’ve made a small Golden Globes Superlative List~

Most likely to win lots of awards despite being reviewed by more than a few as “sub-par”: 
Les Miserables
Most likely to sound like the old ladies from Monty Python’s Flying Circus during an acceptance speech:
Best Dress:
Tina Fey and Kristen Wiig
Best “What the Hell!” Dress:
Lucy Liu
Best “What the Hell??” Dress:
Helena Bonham Carter
Best Couple:
Tina Fey and Amy Poehler
Oddest Couple:
Jessica Alba and her furry bag.
Best Hair and Acceptance Speech Combination:
Anne Hathaway
Worst Hair:
Keith Urban
Most likely to make you feel very moved and at the same time, slightly weird:
Jodie Foster
Most likely to put a smile on my face:
Taylor Swift looking like it’s a surprising disappointment that she didn’t win best song.  LOL!
Most likely to randomly be at every awards show for no reason:
Heidi Klum
Most likely to appear out of no where at every awards show to present the last award:
Julia Roberts
Best surprise:
Girls winning everything.

Also, the only movie I’ve seen out of any of the ones nominated is Moonrise Kingdom.


Thursday, January 10, 2013

Head Colds, a New Semester, and why I Sympathize with Liam Hemsworth

<3 <3 <3 <3 Winter Break 2012-13 <3 <3 <3 <3   

     I just walked into the bathroom at Panera, looked in the mirror, and literally stepped back a little and said “Ughh gross.”

      Before you sit there and say in your head, “Oh no, don’t say that, you’re beautiful…. On the inside”- stop. The reason I look like a train wreck and a half is because I’m battling (hyperbole) yet another head cold. My 4th one this year! I deserve a medal! …Or at least some medicine.
     Anyway, this joyous ailment comes at the absolute most convenient time: the beginning of my second semester of college. I’m already the annoying kid sitting behind you, sniffling during the entire class. That’s like the utter WORST when it comes to making a first impression in classes.
      It’s like this: if you’re a macho bitch, whatever at least you’re somewhat entertaining; if you’re the kid that never talks, God bless you; and if you’re the kid that always talks, then ehh I may or may not want to hit you sometimes. But the person who sits there and just sucks snot back up into their nose the ENTIRE class? That is the least-liked person in class. And that ladies and gentlemen, has been me for my first two days of classes.
    Before winter holiday break, I made a huge decision in my life that I honestly could not feel better about. In short, I decided to end my competitive running career. It took a lot of thought and discussion with people whose opinions I care about, but in the end I turned in my bag, knowing that I was lucky to have had this opportunity, but also knowing that there was a lot more I need to focus on in my life. End of (this section of the) story.

    The point is, with this change, I had a lot to think about over break. But mostly I just watched Downton Abbey, Portlandia season 2 (twice), and a bunch of other shitty movies on Netflix. I really did think about life decisions though. I just don’t feel like sharing them to the world. I must keep some air of mystery, u kno ;)))

    Actually one thing I did think about was disconnecting (just a little bit) from social media. By that I just wanted to rid myself of the worst social media site, Facebook. Not necessarily because I don’t like sharing my own stuff and seeing some of the interesting things people post on there… like this!... but because sometimes Facebook is just  plain trash. First of all, this is not to say that other social networking isn’t trash (nice try Twitter and Pinterest… Myspace too, but cool people don’t use that anymore). Secondly, this is also not to say that I haven’t contributed to the “trash”. 

     However, I also use Facebook for useful things such as hearing about events and keeping up with my international friends. Now I just sound like a big ol’ snob.

    But, as in human nature, I like things that suck and that aren’t good for my brain or my developing real social skills. And as with people who date AWFUL people and can’t just bring themselves to break up with them, I can’t break up with Facebook, just yet. That being said, I sympathize with Liam Hemsworth.

   In spite of the negatively dripping from this blog, I really am looking forward to this semester. In more ways than one, this is truly a fresh start, and with some dedication to hard work, I really might be able to see some success in finding my bliss.

XOXO Gossip Girl…. is a guy.